just wait. be patient.

They say that good things come to those who wait,
but I’m not convinced.
Seems lately that good things are being blessed upon people
who aren’t waiting;
those who aren’t
asking
for these things.
Those who don’t need them.
(Well, that’s my perspective. It’s not good to assume, so I take it back. Okay?)

The unfortunate part is that I’m not patient.
I’m waiting for a few of the very same blessings
that have recently been unexpectedly bestowed upon
friends and family members, and that’s just the problem …
I’m still waiting.

One of these things is
absolutely eating me alive right now,
and though I’m trying my absolute best to remain positive,
I’m finding myself
increasingly
bitter.
I know,
not a flattering quality –
at all.

I’m trying.
Really,
I am.

The worst of it is that
he knows it upsets me,
yet he continues to make it worse.

Thanks.
I’ll be sure to return the favor.
Okay, I take that back.
That wouldn’t be nice, right?

Yep, he talks about it
and talks around my thoughts.
Ehem, as always.
I’m probably better off talking to
a
daggone
cardboard
box
.
Or maybe the dog.
Then there are no expectations.
Truth is, though,
I’m somewhat used to it,
and I knew it would never change.

Shame on me for expecting something different.

I know what you’ll say.
You’ll tell me to get over it.
You’ll say, “Be patient.”
You’ll fill me in on the fact that jealousy is not,
in any
way,
shape or
form,
a good quality.

I know.
I’m trying …
I promise.
It’s just not easy.
Not easy at all when it’s something I’ve wanted,
no, needed,
for
so l-o-n-g.

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One response to “just wait. be patient.

  1. Pingback: january in review. « okay, peanut.

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