I’m still laughing hysterically, even though I know it’s so wrong! Really, though, the thing just WON’T die! It kills me!
So our lawn mower is a nearly 40-year old Simplicity Landlord (37 years old, to be exact. Thanks, Justin.). Yeah, I know, you’ve never even HEARD of a Simplicity Landlord. Me neither! It’s a beautiful orange color with an off-white hood and great 70’s lettering. Jealous? Yeah, you should be. Ha! The thing is hysterical – the belts need to be replaced all the time, it has to be jumped to get it started, the steering wheel falls off, and it’s normally not run with the hood on (Oh, and I’m not “qualified” to drive it as it’s too much of a hazard according to my husband. Sweet!) – it’s seriously on its last leg … or so we thought.
Last night, Justin had planned to cut the grass. He went to get gas for the tractor, and upon his return home, all seemed normal. I was inside making Peanut’s bottles when Justin comes flying in the door, shouting. Here’s what unfolded:
J: “Grab the fire extinguisher!”
Me: “I don’t know where it is! Where is it?”
J: Digging under the kitchen sink, “I don’t know! Get a towel! A blanket! Something!”
Me: “Okay, okay!” I got a favorite blanket (Not on purpose! Sorry, Alli. It was your cute pink one with the hearts on it!) out of the washer and threw it to him. It was the only thing I could think of at the moment – better judgment would have led me to grab one of the junk towels from the bathroom. Oh well. Meanwhile, I started digging under the kitchen sink for the fire extinguisher. I found it and rushed outside, only to find that it was the Simplicity on fire. “Oh my gosh, seriously!?”
J: Removed the blanket, pulled the pin on the fire extinguisher and proceeded to spray the fire, which quickly dissipated. “It sparked, and there must be grass or something that caught with this gas here.”
Me: Laughing hysterically at this point, “Is it dead?”
We’re lucky the fire never made it to the gas tank! After catching his breath, Justin sprayed the tractor off with the hose and connected the jumper cables. So did it start? Heck yeah! I’m telling you, the stinkin’ thing just. won’t. die. And according to Justin this morning,
“Funny you should say, it actually ran better after last night’s incident.”
Yeah, of course it did! It’s lasted 37 years, so what’s 37 more?
Thank goodness the rest of the evening was uneventful – I don’t think we could have handled any more excitement!